Things To Relieve Stress Homepage

Question: Do you feel like punching things to relieve stress?

(Posted by: Blue Eyes on 2009-06-01 06:15:08)

Im not a psycho who enjoys violence but when im angry i really just want to hit the person involved. should i divert my attention somehow? i feel like im a guy sometimes coz whenever im angry i want to unleash it because it makes the other person feel like they shouldnt just treat me like crap. i know thats probably not what the person thinks back but im bad with verbal matches. im a small build and its ridiculous to think i want to do that if u saw me but i dont even consider that at the time. by the way it's not people i dislike in general and i dont actually seek fights and act unruly.

Posted by: K_Alejandro on 2009-06-01, 06:50:53

There have been some different views on 'venting' in the past. The old, typically 'Victorian'/ 'Puritan' view is to bottle it. That proved to have some negative results. That swung to the opposite extreme to vent it. Unfortunately, that also has negative results. Releasing anger is the same as 'feeling' anger. This feeling can compound and allow feelings of anger to mount way beyond what the situation initially called for. This approach is no longer generally considered the best course of action (the last 10-15 years). We often see people who 'freak out' at little things, but when big things come, they are reserved, calm and calculating and wonder why the disparity in their reactions. This is an example because we can see how they might feel that there is less need to control their reaction when the situation is minor, so allow a bit of venting - which compounds into an explosion. On the other hand, when a major problem arises, they immediately see the need to control their reaction because logic might allow for a much larger reaction than their explosivity towards minor problems. What negative results do they experience from this control? Usually none. Modern science has revealed that this is largely due to the fact that emotions are little more than chemicals. Many of these are controlled by a part of the brain called the amigdyla. This part of the brain can allow us to react with what is sometimes called a 'fight or flight' reaction which causes us to act without thinking. It does this by jumping in before the reasoning part of our brain can get a chance to do its job. It releases chemicals that stimulate us and give us the needed 'jump' to take vigorous action. It can do this on command - namely by allowing yourself to get angered. You will then experience a rush that often compounds to encourage violent action. The cause of this reaction has little to do with what the person actually did. It has to do with how you allow your thoughts to flow. This means that you need to identify the patterns of what gets you to that point. Especially because the amigdyla is particularly good at blocking rational thought. So when you see a situation that you think will lead to anger, find a way to stop that pattern. Stop heading towards that 'brink'. Nobody's perfect, but if you are aware of the cycle, and aware that all you need to do is convince yourself that there is no need to get angry (easier said than done), you can avoid this negative experience. These chemicals that control emotion are actually pretty bad for you physically, so it's in your best interests to prevent their release unless there genuinely is something that is life or death. Try to reflect on how you feel after a situation like that occurs. Invariably we all feel pretty bad about having gotten angry and we often wish we could take something back. Being angry is actually not very pleasant. Our 'better judgement' often returns after the moment has passed. Make a note of that and try to remember it when you feel emotions start to ramp up. As a female, you may actually find this more difficult to do than a guy since your emotions may run stronger. Females tend to not be so violent mostly because of their size. Avoiding a fight is a good tactic for self-preservation when you are smaller and weaker (which is not an insult, just a general fact). This in itself may lead to less outbursts because they cut the amigdyla's response short.

Posted by: Daniel B on 2009-06-01, 06:26:08

When i was young.when i got older ive changed, you might think of take anger manigment course

Posted by: gleelogan on 2009-06-04, 07:15:21

Buy a punching bag and work out with it..I mean the heavy one...lift weights, go jogging, take a fast walk somewhere...blow off some steam..